Just do what you’re told, and don’t ask questions.
An obedient child is a well-behaved child, a rewarded child, a loved child; seen but never heard. With neatly brushed hair, hands folded, and perfect manners. The obedient child is respectful and knows never to speak back, speak up, or speak their truth. Children who follow directions always win.
“Get good grades.”
“Don’t get mustard on your dress.”
“Follow directions.”
“Give grandpa a hug.”
“Write neatly.”
“Eat your veggies.”
Listen. Follow. Obey. Comply.
If you veer off track it will bring unwanted attention. Someone might find out that underneath the smiles, stickers, and stain-free clothes- you are only a child. Born unique, wild and free; meant to roam. Brought here to wander, wonder, and wallow in your feelings, in the mud, and in your hopes and dreams.
You can explore, but stay in the fenced area. You can talk, but only for ten minutes- and use an inside voice. You can say no, but be prepared for consequences. Jump, but not too high. Run, but not too fast. Be yourself, but try to fit in.
I want you to learn to speak up for yourself, but never to me, and never to your teacher, your grandmother, or the mailman. Don’t speak up in public- it will embarrass me, and don’t speak up to your friends because you might lose them. As a matter of fact, don’t speak up at all.
If you follow directions you will get good grades. If you get good grades you will get into college. If you finish college you will get a stable job. If you do well at your job you will make lots of money. Once you retire, you can finally relax and enjoy yourself.
If you rebel and go against the grain, you will live a very different life. You might spend endless hours exploring passions and hobbies and things that bring you joy. You might love yourself enough to make choices that feel good. You might begin to ponder and ask questions that help you learn and grow. This path will bring you closer to who you truly are and shine a light on your strengths.
The path of the radical is not the easy way out. It feels feral and untamed and filled with emotion. To be radical means leading with the heart and trusting intuition. Grass-stained knees and sleeping in late; crafting, creating, and constructing. It’s leaving logic at the door to make room for innovation. It’s screaming with anger and laughing to tears. It’s stepping into the unknown and trusting a beautiful process beyond understanding.