You can choose to be right, if that’s what important to you.
You can have all the facts and the correct information. You can have wisdom and authority and many more years lived. But when it comes down to it, sometimes – you have to choose; to be right, or to protect the relationship between you and your child.
They might throw a tantrum because they don’t want to leave the playground. It’s getting late and dinner needs to be cooked. There is a chill in the air, and nobody has a coat. You could be right about leaving, or you can let it go. You can stay for another hour. The hair on the back of your neck will stand up once the sun starts to set. The idea of a nice, sit-down dinner will transform into a drive-through order. Nobody will get hurt if you choose to let go, but choosing to be right doesn’t leave space for understanding.
You can choose to be right, or you can choose to let go.
Your child punched their sibling during a common dispute over what movie to watch. You can choose to be right, or you can choose to listen. Listen with empathy and an unbiased opinion. Listen without the intention of responding. Listen so that the words from your child’s mouth may flow into the ears of a loving adult. An adult who doesn’t need to be right.
Boundaries are important and principles matter, but rules are meant to be broken. You can choose to be the rule setter. The king of the castle. The all-knowing being who stands tall above the rest. Or you can choose equilibrium. A beautiful balance between parent and child, playing on the same team – aiming for the same goals.
Your child yells at you with a disrespectful tone. It causes you to shutter and triggers your anger.
You can choose to be right, or you can choose empathy. Empathy allows emotions to flow freely. There is no judgement. It holds space for conversations and integration. Lessons to be learned, questions to be answered. Empathy opens the door to a parent-child bond like no other.
Letting go of being right ignites a path of self-discovery. Our children don’t need us to be right. They need us to be loving, open-minded, and curious. The need us to step into the role of mentor and out of the role of leader. A leader has followers, but a mentor has mentees. When we learn and grow together, we cultivate a relationship that can withstand any challenge.
My wish for you today is that you let go of being right. Be kind, be understanding, be soft, be honest, and be authentic, but don’t be right. You get to choose.